


Sunshine Boy

by primgles



Category: Free!
Genre: Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, Child Abuse, Depression, Hella depressing, Hospitalization, Implied/Referenced Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, M/M, Self Confidence Issues, Self-Harm, Suicidal Thoughts, it gets better eventually, lmao don't worry
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-07-14
Updated: 2016-07-24
Packaged: 2018-07-23 23:11:33
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 10
Words: 15,311
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7483710
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/primgles/pseuds/primgles
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A story if how Nagisa lost his shine.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Ray of Sunshine

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> How Iwatobi's little ball of sunshine is actually sad inside.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm too tired
> 
>  
> 
> [U.S. National Suicide Prevention Hotline 1-800-273-8255](http://www.suicidepreventionlifeline.org)

The day was a hard one for him, his classmates were harsher than before, calling him profanities and tossing papers with insults sprawled on it, and sisters switched out his swim gear  _again._ Haruka and Makoto sighed, Haru was ready to offer up his jammers but Nagaisa refused and decided on skipping swimming practice. "Nagisa, are you sure? I mean - it's not really _like_ _you_ , to skip out on practice." Makoto asks the short blonde, watching if there's any signs of sadness or anger. Nagisa smiled and started to rock on his feet. "I'm super sure, Mako-chan! I can make it up tomorrow, anyway! Plus, I need to help my sisters cook today!" The bubbly blonde explains, smiling and giddy. 

After saying his goodbyes and see you tomorrow's, Nagisa made his way to his home. Knowing it'd be empty until midnight, he dropped his bag near the foot of his bed and pulled out a small glasses case. Walking to the bathroom, he strips of the itchy school uniform, and sits near the bath. Opening the glasses case, it held the ' _pain-relievers_ ,' small razor blades that he pried out from sharpeners, some from shavers and one from a box cutter. He felt so disgusted and guilty that he smiled at his collection. Nagisa chose the one that cut the deepest - the box cutter. Stretching out his left leg to see the scars he created himself. 

For lying, he sliced his thigh three times. He deserved each slice, Nagisa watched as blood blossomed out of the deep cut. _It was an addiction_. He watched as his blood pool out, hitting the floor and creating a minuscule sized puddle. Nagisa _believed_ that he deserved to be treated the way he was treated. He believed that he was nothing. _Believed_ that he deserved every cut, old and new. His vision warped as tears began to fall out of his eyes. Nagisa sliced his skin even more, opening up his skin, creating new regrets. _An addiction indeed._

Nagisa pulled himself together, after what seemed like an eternity. Turning the knob, he watched the water gush out and fill the tub. Getting in, he melted into the warm water, the stinging burn that came with the warm water, he loved the most. Arms relaxing and flopping out of the tub, Nagisa wondered if he should slice his wrist, watch his blood drip as he bled out. "Another day... Another day..." He told himself, sticking his hand back into the warm comfort of the tub.

Thoughts wandered into parts of Nagisa's brain, a voice said to him, "you deserve to die, you know? The swim club can find another swimmer, your sisters would be _beyond glad_ that their gay brother is dead." Nagisa's magenta coloured eyes started to fill with tears. The ache in his chest and throat made him breathe in shallow breaths and hiccups. Trying to silence his crying, even though he was alone. He bit his wrist and started to shake a little, squeezing his eyes shut and emitting muffled cries. _'I can't even hold in my tears,'_ Thehoney blonde thought to himself, more reasons added,  the more the inky black feeling grew and grew. 

An hour later, Nagisa was staring at the ceiling, expressionless. He craved sleep, but his mind wouldn't allow such a privilege. Crying, mostly because he was just _so_ tired. _Tired_ of faking his happiness. _Tired_ of being such an easy target. _Tired of breathing and existing._ Nagisa moved onto his side, facing the window, "I'll be okay, I'll be okay, I'll be okay..." He softly chanted to himself. 

Maybe tomorrow, he would be okay, he could forget this whole day ever even happy. He could believe that with all his heart, but that voice just lingered in the back of his mind, 

" _you don't deserve to live._ "

Jolting awake, his body was shaking and his heart slamming against his rib cage. Shakily getting out of bed, his small feet touched the cold floor, sending chills shooting up his leg. Tears flowed freely from his eyes, as he made his way to the restroom. With jittery hands, the blonde opened up the glasses case and grabbed the box cutter. Dropping the blade, he hissed as his hand grasped around it too tightly. Nagisa just sat on his legs and cries until he had a headache. "Stupid, stupid, stu-stupid..." Nagisa muttered to himself as he tried to steady and call himself down again.

Once he was steadied (not really, still a little shaky) the magenta eyed boy picked up the blade and sat crossed legged. He chose his right thigh, because his left leg was too scarred and the scar tissue was too hard to slice through. Nagisa pushed the blade into his thigh, sliding it across his leg slowly. Before it bled, it showed the pink flesh beneath his light skin, then the metal smelling blood flowed from the cut. The sobbing boy repeated the process another four times before he was satisfied. Not bothering to rinse off the blood, he wiped the blood with some antiseptic wipes and wrapped his thigh with what gauze he had left. _'Need to buy more...'_ He thought to himself, limping a little as he walked out. Stuffing the blade back into its case and into his bag.

Trying once again, Nagisa laid himself down gently, not bothering to lay on either side. He pulled the blankets up, just enough to cover his nose and tried to get comfy on his back. He, if he were to be truly honest, doubt that he'll get any sleep - not even a minute of it. He might as well try to make himself comfortable. 

Nagisa was caught in a daze, not asleep, but not awake either. Thoughts wandering and reliving happy times. _"Happy times,"_  he whispered to himself. Wishing and begging what ever god was out there, to bring those times back to him. Bring back his genuine happiness. 

_Bring back what he used to be._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry about this.


	2. Fake

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rei and Makoto notice their sunshine started to go away.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sike more like yikes

* * *

_**5:54 A.M.**_ Great, so he got at least _some_ sleep, even if that sleep was mostly nightmares and voices. Forgetting that, Nagisa rolled over and almost yelled due to the suddenness of the pain on his thigh. He bit his lip and huffed as he slowly stood up and took off the gauze. He grimaced at how much blood there was, _'stupid Nagisa...'_ The groggy boy thought to himself. Heading to the bath, he didn't even want to see how terrible he looked. In the end, he had to when he brushed his teeth. _'Disgusting.'_ He thought to himself again, cringing at the dark bags under his eyes, and the paleness of his skin. 

Stepping into the bath, he turned on the shower head. Feeling the hot water run over his body, it felt like it burned his skin. "You deserve the burn," the voice said to him. If he could describe the voice, it'd be himself, but with a small echo as it talks. Growing irritated, the honey-blonde turned off the water and stepping out of the bath. He packed his jammers, hiding an extra one in his folded clothes for after practice. Getting readied for school, he hated how he was so small and the clothes sagged on him. He squeezed at the uniform's sleeve and saw how loose it was. 

Going down to the kitchen, he saw one of his sisters and she saw him. "Good morning!" She chirped as she practically shoved a piece of toast into Nagisa's mouth. "Good mornin' to you too, I guess." Nagisa says as he shrugged and ate the toast. Hearing his father walk into the kitchen, the blonde kept looking away. "Nagisa, you better get the fuck out of here before I throw you out like last time." The man said to Nagisa, which made the boy stand and practically run out the door. 

Arriving at the gates of the school, Nagisa couldn't breathe. Not realising he ran all the way to school, he probably even beat Rei to school. Inhaling to get air into his lungs, he popped his back and sat to wait for his friends. "Oh, Nagisa, you're here rather early," comments someone, acknowledging the voice, it was Makoto. "Oh - uhm, yeah, Mako-chan! I wanted to be here early so I can show you, Rei-chan and Haru-chan that I can be here early!" Nagisa explained, hopping a little around the tall brunette. "Ah, okay then Nagisa," Makoto shrugged, trying not to overthink about the vibe Nagisa is giving off. "Wait, where's Haru-chan?" The perky blonde asked, pausing his hopping. "Oh, he's at home, he caught the flu again." Makoto explain with a sigh, Nagisa dramatically sighed. 

Before the blonde can interrogate Makoto some more, Rei walks up to them and greets them. "Rei-chan!" Nagisa cheers as he almost tackles the blue haired teen down. "Nagisa! It's too early for me to become injured due to your strangly strong hugs." Rei states as he tries to pry Nagisa off of him, though he fails. "I'm sorry, Rei-chan." The hyper blonde apologises, releasing his grip on the teen and stepping back. Both Makoto and Rei are surprised by this action, mostly Rei. "Ah- it's okay? Nagisa-kun?" Rei replies back, sounding more like a question. Nagisa flashes him a smile before he starts to skip to class. "Makoto-sempai, does he seem off?" Rei asks the taller male, looking to him. Makoto nods, watching Nagisa stop and wave them over. 

Seeing them chat to each other, Nagisa assumes that it might be about him. Worried that they might be planning to ditch him for someone better. _Worried that they might hate him._ They should, in Nagisa's mind because, he's weak and small, annoying, and he cuts his thighs. Speaking of which, his limp has gotten a little bit worse. The shot of pain that shoots down his right thigh has it almost buckling into itself. The blonde's mood went downhill in that minute. Thoughts about how he could end it when he gets home, thoughts about how everyone wouldn't really care if he died or not. 

Makoto and Rei make their way to their short friend, immediately noticing how quiet he became. Not even noticing their presence around him, Rei having to get him out of whatever zone he was in. "Oh, sorry Rei-chan!" Nagisa apologises, giving him a small smile. "It's okay, Nagisa. Not to be nosy, but, why are you limping?" The blue haired teen asks, noticing his blonde friend freeze for a second. "My sisters and I were- uhm- playing football and- uhm they tackled me and- and I landed really hard." Nagisa stammered as he started to shake a little, albeit trying to play it off. Walking ahead of Rei and Makoto, the school bell rings, signifying that school has begun. 

During one of his lessons, Nagisa kept thinking about ways to end it all. Maybe he could just cut his wrist, hit a major artery. Maybe he should jump off some building, or drown himself. A piece of balled up paper snapped him out of his suicidal thoughts. Opening the crumbled up paper, he's not surprised by the message, _'KILL YOURSELF YOURE NOTHING.'_ He sighs and shoves the paper into the pocket of his uniform sweater. _'I'll do what you want me to do,'_ the blonde thought to himself, trying to focus on the subject. 

During lunch, Makoto and Rei find their friend sleeping on the roof, his bag as a makeshift pillow. "Nagisa-" Rei calls, just about to softly wake him up. Jumping awake, the bloodshot eyed boy seemed panicked and shaky. "Oh... Hey Rei-chan... Sorry I'm just really, really tired..." He explained with a yawn, stretching out his limbs with a pop of the joints.

"How come you were sleeping on the roof?" Rei inquired as he sat next to Nagisa, wondering why he didn't have lunch, or ask for food. "Nagisa, I have an extra left over sushi- do you want it?" The teen asked, hoping for a 'yes," instead of something else. "No thank you, Rei-chan." Nagisa said as he continued to stare at the concrete ground. "You sure? I mean- you really sure?" Rei asked, not really believing what he just heard from his friend. "I already ate, so don't worry-" The blonde explained plainly, lacking his norma happiness. "But Nagisa-" Rei interjected, not believing his friend's words. "I said I'm fine, Rei, so don't worry." Nagisa said sternly, startling both Rei and Makoto. 

"Nagisa, Rei is just- no, both he and I are starting to worry about you." Makoto explains for Rei and himself. "Don't worry about me, I'm fine." Nagisa states as he looks at the both of them. "But, it's kind of hard _not_ to, you've been limping since this morning." The brunette says as he tries to get to his blonde haired friend. "I'm telling you- I'm fucking fine." Nagisa states once more, cussing to emphasise his statement. "Fuck this, I'm leaving," the blonde sighs as he stumbled to get up. Leaving, he left his startled friends behind on the roof. 

"Rei, can you ask Nagisa, after practice, to go with him home?" Mako to asks with a concerned tone in his voice, green eyes filled with worry. 

"Yes, I'll see what I can do." 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> What the fuck joke did I make up there.


	3. Broken

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Nagisa wants to cry.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I regret everything.

After leaving, Nagisa finally realises how bad he snapped at his friends. They were concerned for him. Rei and Makoto must really hate him now. He thinks about what they must be saying. _"Nagisa is so ungrateful, who does he think he is?"_ Holding back some tears, his throat feels as if it constricted on him. His chest growing tight and hard to breathe. Wanting to get out of the shrinking hallway, he runs down the stairs, tripping and tumbling down the flight of stairs, rolling a few feet before coming to a hault. "Fucking fuck!" Nagisa hisses out, writhing on the floor due to the burning pain on his thighs. Tears flowing from his magenta eyes. 

Shakily standing up, almost yelling due to the shot of pain from his right ankle, he had to hold onto the rail for support. "Shit..." The pained boy whispers to himself, getting a head rush. He's glad that the hallway leading to the roof was empty, glad no one had to see him fail. Feeling his nose starting to drip, he assumes it's just his snot from all his crying. Nagisa fell to his knees, his hand still resting on the railing. The blonde began to sob, emitting soft wails and coughs. Hiccups racked his curled up form, the hallway becoming a little hot. 

"Nagisa?" Someone asked, the blonde didn't bother to acknowledge the person. Trying to calm down, all he was able to do was silence the soft wails. He still coughed and hiccuped, trying to get air into his lungs. Seeing someone squat in front of him, he was forced to see who it was. "R-Re-Rei-chan," Nagisa hiccuped out, trying to smile but that attempt made him cry even more. "Let's go to the nurse, do you think you can stand?" Rei asked him, assuming he can't. "N-No, can y-you just take me ho-home?" Nagisa asked, looking into Rei's eyes. "Yes, but first we need to go to the nurse, okay?" The teen asked, trying to keep his cool. The crying male nodded, holding his arms up. Rei turned and helped Nagisa get onto his back. 

On the way to the nurse's office, Nagisa must of fell asleep, still some hiccups here and there. "Makoto, do you know where Nagisa lives, by any chance?" Rei inquired to the taller teen. "He lives on near Haru's street, the one before it. Nagisa's house is the only two story there." Makoto explains, "do you need me to follow, just in case?" Rei nodded and continued to walk. 

Arriving at the nurse's office, they explained to the woman that they found Nagisa at the bottom of the stairs, crying. The woman in the nurse uniform, red haired and a gentle looking face was attempting to wake up the small blonde. "Nagisa, honey-" she says to him, getting a little startled by how quick Nagisa sat up. He woke in a panicked state, eyes heavily bloodshot, his breathing quickening and he started to shake again. The nurse had to help him calm down, instructing him to breathe slowly. As the blonde began to breathe normally, his heartbeat starting to regulate. "Nagisa, how did you end up at the bottom of the stairs?" she asked kindly, waiting for him to respond. "I-I fell down the staircase, ma'am." Nagisa responded, looking towards his friends. "Do you feel pain anywhere?" The nurse asked, "yeah, m-my right ankle, ma'am." He said to her as he pointed to the very swollen ankle. 

After the nurse wraps his ankle, she tells the boy that his ankle is probably sprained but should go to the hospital, just to make sure it is not broken. Giving the trio a pass to go home. Saying their thanks, Rei carries a very exhausted Nagisa, Makoto leading the two. "Mako-chan... Rei-chan, I'm sorry." Nagisa mumbled into Rei's back. "Nagisa, there's no need for you to be sorry, it's okay. We're just glad we found you." Makoto explained as he looked to his sleepy blonde friend. "Just rest while we walk to your house, 'kay?" Rei asked, feeling his friend nod between his shoulder blades.

"Can I go to Rei-chan's house instead?" Nagisa asked Rei, poking his (surprisingly) squishy cheek. "I-I guess, how come you changed your mind about going home?" Rei questioned his small friend, "I just don't want to go home yet. I wanna stay with Rei-chan." Nagisa responded as his soft hand stopped poking. Makoto just chuckled to himself, totally seeing how they're oblivious to each other's feelings. 

Arriving to Rei's home, it was a small one bedroom house, painted white and the roof painted grey.  "Makoto, would you like to stay over?" The blue haired teen asked, hearing Makoto shyly mumble a 'sure' "Wouldn't your parents be mad that you-" Makoto was about to ask, interrupted by Rei saying, "I live alone, so don't worry." Finally inside the house, Rei helping Nagisa get settled into his sofa. "Thank you, Rei-chan." The blonde says to his friend, laying down. "There's food in the fridge if you want anything, Makoto." Rei points to the black refrigerator, Makoto nodding as he sits on the maroon carpeted floor.

After several hours, Nagisa wakes up with a headache, he realises he has a thick comforter draped over his body. Seeing Makoto asleep on the longer sofa. The blonde sits up, getting ready to stand but forgetting his sprained ankle, he landed on his knees with a thump. Hearing footsteps, he sees Rei's hand held out in front of it. Holding onto the hand, he gets pulled up and balances on his left leg, Rei holding onto his waist. "Thank you Rei-chan..." Nagisa mumbles, "what time is it?" Rei looks down at his watch, realising its way past 7 P.M. "It's about, 8:30 or so-" the teen says before getting interrupted. "I need to get home. I-I'm going to get in so much trouble." Nagisa panics, trying to escape Rei's hold. "Nagisa, I'll call your parents and tell them you'll stay here, because you can't even walk." Rei explains as he tightens his hold on the fidgeting blonde. "Rei, please let me go home. I don't want to get into trouble. He'll-he'll get really really mad and-and—" Nagisa stammers, his voice breaking as he begins to tear up. He crumbled to the floor, sobbing and coughing. Rei kneeling next to him, trying to think.

Nagisa remembering all the times that the disgusting man he called his father would throw bottles to him, push him down the stairs and kick and beat him when he's down. His mother wasn't there to help him, she was all the way in Russia on some business trip. The blonde would plead and beg for him to stop, though, it'd make it worse. There was some instances where his father locked him out the house, in the rain. Nagisa had take shelter in the small tool shed. There was a time, where Nagisa was deprived of any sort of food and locked in his room for three days, only given a small cup of water every three hours. There wasn't a day, where Nagisa wasn't abused in some form. Whether it's be mentally, to physically, there wasn't a day of no abuse. 

Rei panicked, not knowing how to comfort him. Wrapping his long arms around the sobbing boy, sitting and pulling Nagisa to his chest. He didn't know if that would help Nagisa, but it didn't hurt to try. Rei didn't say anything, just softly rocked his friend side to side. Nagisa's cries finally calmed down, a few hiccups and coughs but calmed nonetheless. Peeking to see Nagisa's face, he fell asleep again. "Is he okay?" Makoto asked, startling Rei and making him flinch. "I... I don't know." He replied as he truly did not know of his usually hyper, go-lucky friend is really okay.

Rei carried Nagisa to his bedroom, carrying him bridal style. The teen laid the sleeping body down, pulling the covers over Nagisa, flicking on the lamp near his bed. Walking down, he saw Makoto getting his bag and standing st the door. "Thank you for inviting me here, Rei." Makoto smiled as he bowed to show his gratitude. "You're welcome anytime, Makoto." Rei chuckled out, scratching the back of his neck. "Just call me if anything, okay?" Makoto asked as he handed Rei a piece of paper with his number scribbled onto it. "Ah, thank you," the teen muttered, putting the paper into his pocket. Makoto bid a goodnight and he was out the door. 

Rei walked back to the room, checking if Nagisa was still asleep. Startled to find Nagisa with out his uniform on, the blankets sprawled about on the bed. Sighing, he had to slowly wake up Nagisa to change into some of Rei's smaller clothes. The blue haired boy turned on the main light to see. Nagisa was in a half awake daze, making a face due to him being awoken. "C'mon, I have some clothes for you to change into." Rei whispers to him, not wanting to wake him up fully. Helping Nagisa put on a tee shirt, with some western band's name printed on it. "Can you put on the pants by yourself?" He asks the sleepy blonde, though he shakes his head. Letting out an exaggerated sigh, he helped Nagisa stand up, telling him to take off his school pants. Helping the short boy into the loose fitted pyjama pants. Seeing his marred thighs, his right one bruised and left heavily scarred. He left and turned off the bedroom light. 

After that, Rei started to recall the bruises on Nagisa's small and thin body. Recalling that he could see the smudged concealer on his body, and his face. He paced in his living room. Remembering there were majority of the bruises on his torso area, some at the junction of his head and shoulders. Looking at like a hand wrapped Nagisa's throat. Rei started to feel terrible about how he couldn't see through Nagisa's façade, how he couldn't see the make up painted onto his body to hide the bruises. Hearing Nagisa coughing, he rushed to see Nagisa crying in his sleep. Opening his swollen red eyes, "Can you sleep with me please... I don't want to have anymore nightmares tonight..." He sobbed out, coughing in between some of the words. 

Rei crawled into his bed, awkwardly laying next to Nagisa. The sobbing boy rested one arm onto Rei's waist, the other sandwiched between the two bodies. After a few minutes, Nagisa quieted down again, finally back asleep. Rei snaked one arm under Nagisa's head, playing with Nagisa's puffy and soft hair. The other wrapped around Nagisa and drew circles into his back. Before even realising what he did, he kissed the top of Nagisa's head. He felt like it was all or nothing, time to say what he felt.  

_"I love you- I really do. I love you and everything about you."_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> REGRET  
> R E G R E T T I N G


	4. Rest

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Nagisa finally got to relax and rest.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Would you listen to the songs I put, if I were to put them. OH AND LETS PRETEND REI DYED HIS HAIR BLUE.

Slowly waking up, Nagisa immediately loved the warmth that surrounded him. Keeping his eyes closed, he inhaled deeply, he loved whatever smelt so sweet — like _strawberries and peaches._ Opening his eyes, he was startled to see someone's body. Looking to who, he turned tomato red once he saw Rei's sleeping face. Nagisa slowly moved up to get a better look at his face. He smiled to himself, noticing how angry he looks while he was asleep, noticing a little bit of stubble, noticing it was black, rather than blue. Nagisa ran his small fingers through the blue mess of Rei's hair. Leaning towards his cheek, he planted a soft kiss, resting on his elbow and continued to comb his fingers through Rei's soft hair. 

Not even realising he fell asleep, Nagisa awoke to an empty bed. Sitting up and stretching his arms and legs. His ankle still throbbing. "Rei-chan!" Nagisa called out, attempting to stand on the side of the bed. Rei popped his head from the kitchen, showing half of his body. He was wearing a baggy blue tee shirt, with loose fitting, black pyjama pants. 'He looks hot-' Nagisa thought to himself, before cutting off his thoughts and putting on a smile for Rei. The blue haired boy walked over to Nagisa, helping him walk to the sofa. 

"Rei-chan, did you change me in my sleep?" Nagisa giggled out, leaning onto Rei's hold. "Yeah- I mean, you helped a little bit." Rei explained to a seemingly happy Nagisa. Rei ended up smiling back Nagisa too. "Can you take me to the hospital? My ankle still hurts." Nagisa asked as he was sat down onto the sofa. "Yeah, do you want to use the motorcycle or the car?" Rei questioned as he got up and gave Nagisa his school bag. "Oh yeah! I forgot I had my clothes in here!" The blonde says as he pulls out a pair of cargo shorts and a plain red tee shirt. "I need help, with... Uh... You know?" Nagisa shyly says as his cheeks turned a light pink tint. 

Back in the bedroom, Rei sat Nagisa down and turned away. "Huh? How come you turned around, Rei-chan?" Nagisa asked from behind him, "you changed me last night-" Nagisa stopped, realising that the boy he loved, saw his scars and cuts. "You saw them, huh?" He asked in a sad tone, pulling the shirt over his head. "Yeah..." Rei muttered, still facing the wall. "What are you going to do? Rat me out to the counsellor?" Nagisa hissed, assuming that's what Rei do since he's a good boy. Rei turned around, facing Nagisa in an angry way. "I know you don't want that, so no, but- I do want you to hand over your blades." He stated in stern voice, pushing up his glasses. 

Nagisa sighed and told Rei where he hid his blades. Rei got the case and threw it out the window, literally. Nagisa was surprised by his way of handling it, "I just realised- I need to get home." Nagisa says as he tries to stand. "I- okay, I'll drive you there and give you crutches that I have, okay?" Rei asked, sighing at the end of his question. "Okay..." Nagisa murmured, looking down, staring at his legs. "I'm really sorry, Rei." He apologised, starting to tear up. Feeling hands wipe away his tears, Nagisa looked into Rei's eyes. Rei sat on his legs, between Nagisa's legs. "It's okay, just promise me, you won't do anything to hurt yourself again- please." Rei whispered to him, his voice breaking as he too, was tearing up. "I can't promise that, but I'll try my best." Nagisa responded back, pulling Rei into a tight hug. 

"Rei-chan, can we lay down together again?" Nagisa asked, talking into Rei's shirt. "Yeah, that'd be nice." Rei smiled down at Nagisa, as he kissed his forehead. Getting beneath the thick covers, Nagisa and Rei held each other, listening to each other's heartbeats. "You know, you grind your teeth at night?" Rei says as he broke the silence. "Really? Is it bad?" Nagisa chuckled out as he looked up at the blue haired boy. "Really bad." Rei replied as he smiled at Nagisa. "I'll buy you one of those mouth guards." He offered, watching Nagisa's mouth drop. "No! I'll have one of those wires around my face!" Nagisa said loudly as he laughed at how he'd look in those. "You'd still look beautiful-" Rei says as his eyes widened. "Sorry I didn't-" he stammered, trying to apologise. Feeling a kiss on his nose, he hears Nagisa say, "shush it Rei-chan." They laughed together, snuggling even closer to each other, loving the warmth their bodies gave. 

Cracking his eyes open, Nagisa's eyes started to hurt due to the direct sunlight in his eyes. Rolling over, he found that the bed was empty, Rei's side still faintly warm. Slowly standing on one leg, he limped to the wall, trying not to use his injured foot as much. Basically hopping on one foot, he found Rei in the kitchen, making some ramen. "Nagisa! You should've just called me!" Rei panicked as he saw his small lover on one leg. He dashed to the hallway, grabbing the crutches and giving them to Nagisa. "Rei-chan's so nice!" Nagisa smiled, using the crutches to make his way to the high standing table. Rei just muttered something and set the table. 

After eating, Rei dumped the empty ramen bowls into the rubbish bin, grabbing extra an comforter and heading the long sofa. Nagisa already there, curled up in a small ball. Seeing Rei, Nagisa smiled and opened up his arms. "Can Rei-chan cuddle with me." He chuckled out, sounding silly to himself. "Yeah, yeah," Rei laughed as he sat next to Nagisa, opening the blanket and draping it over their bodies. Rei's body got engulfed in the blonde's warm hugs. "What time is it?" Nagisa questioned, assuming it was around 5 or 6 P.M. due to the setting sun. "Almost 7 P.M. why?" Rei questioned back, worried that Nagisa wanted to leave. "Just checking." The blonde replied as he snuggles closer to Rei.

They watched some penguin documentary, comfortable in the silence. Around 7:30, Rei starts to cook dinner, just a simple dish of rice, fish and squid. "Do you want to eat on the sofa? It'll be more comfortable for you." Rei offered as he started to put the food onto plastic plates. Hearing his lover go, 'mhm!' he brought both plates to the black sofa. "I didn't know Rei-chan cooked! It smells so good!" Nagisa says as his mouth literally starts to drool. "It's just fish and squid, really." Rei shyly says, turning a little pink. Nagisa began to eat, stuffing his mouth as if he hasn't eaten for days. Which was true, Nagisa was practically living off water, gum and other drinks.

"Nagisa, slow down before you choke." Rei chuckled out, surprised at how hungry his blonde lover really was. "How long has it been since you last ate?" Rei inquired as he finished his dish. "Uhm... Two days?" Nagisa says, sounding more like a question than an answer. Rei stared at him in disbelief, "t-two days?" He stuttered out, holding Nagisa close to him. "It's no biggie, at least I'm eating now, right?" Nagisa asked into his chest, putting the plate onto the coffee table near them. "Yes, but two days? How?" Rei questioned, pulling away and looking at the magenta eyes he fell in love with. "I drank lots of water and chewed gum." Nagisa responded too nonchalantly, making it seemed like it was normal. 

Rei just pulled him close again, laying down, pulling Nagisa with him. "Is this fine for you?" He asked, playing with Nagisa's luscious blonde hair. Feeling him nod, he decided to keep quiet, letting the telly show fill the room with noise. 

'We could stay like this forever,' Rei thought to himself, feeling Nagisa's heart beat along side his own. 

Around 1:30 in the morning, Nagisa woke in a frantic, grabbing at Rei's chest. He started to cry into his chest, trying to keep himself quiet. Holding in his coughs and trying to even out his breathing. "What's wrong, love?" Rei asked in a croaky voice, feeling the floor for his glasses. "I h-had a nightmare aga-again." Nagisa hiccuped as he gave up trying to hide his sobbing. Nagisa sat up, hiccuping and coughing out apologies. Rei wrapped his arms around Nagisa's body, rubbing circles on his back and slowly rocking him.

"You left me an-and everyone was hur-hurting me. Y-You didn't he-help me when I called. You sa-said that you hated me and that you don't care- and that you never loved me. It felt so real..." The blonde explained, sobbing more into Rei's chest, dampening the shirt. "I could never hate you, I do care about you and I love so much," Rei cooed to his crying love, his heart hurting, listening to him crying. "It was just a dream, okay? I'd never do that to you..." Rei continued, probably not making sense. Nagisa nodded, letting the rocking calm down his heaving and coughing. Rei ran his fingers through his hair as Nagisa rested his head on the teen's shoulder. 

Feeling Rei's arm go under his legs, he carried Nagisa to the bedroom. "Do you want to lay down, or continue what I was doing?" He questioned as he whispered to Nagisa. The blonde kept his legs around the boy's waist, giving him a wordless answer. "Okay," Rei folded his legs underneath Nagisa, almost giving Nagisa a seat. Rei started to rock softly, left to right. Humming some tune, Nagisa rested his head back onto his shoulder. Realising it was the western band, Coldplay, he recognised it was their song, 'Fix You.' 

Soon after that realisation, sleep lulled him into their hands. He fell under their spell, letting their fingertips slowly numb his body, softening the pain in his ankle.

_He fell into a dreamless sleep, no longer feeling Rei's hands drawing circles into his back, rocking him slowly. No longer listening to Rei's beautiful humming._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter's song would probably be  
> 'Fix You,' by Coldplay  
> AND WHAT A FUCKING BUILD HUH?


	5. Alone

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Nagisa gets taken home

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Nagisa's dad fucks shit up  
> AND LMAO THIS CHAPTER WAS SO RUSHED, IM LAUGHING.

Pounding at their door wakes up the two, scaring them awake, actually. Nagisa groans and covers his ears, dropping his head back to the fluffy pillows. Rei mutters something along the lines of, "who the hell is here at this hour?" He stretches as he strolls to the front door, opening the door to see a mean looking man, with slicked back dirty blonde hair, wearing a black business suit. He had dark blue eyes, Rei felt like he knew what he was thinking. He stood around Makoto's height, maybe even taller. The man seemed sad and worried. "I'm sorry to bother you at this time, but I'm Naraku Hazuki, a-and looking for Nagisa Hazuki." He says, his eyes looking anywhere but Rei.

"I'm sorry, who are you?" Rei asked the man, trying not to sound rude. "I'm his father, and he's been gone for two days. He didn't come home since Friday, I'm so worried." Naraku explained, looking as if he was going to cry. "I'll be right back, okay sir?" Rei asked as he smiled, closing the door. He knew the man spotted Nagisa in Rei's room, with the door left wide open. "Nagisa, your dad's here?" He says as he walked to the bedroom. Nagisa jolted up, looking at Rei with scared eyes. "You sure? How does he know? How?" Nagisa kept repeating, trying to keep his cool. The door pounded again, sounding as if one more bang would break a hole in the door.

Nagisa sighed and threw his legs over the side of the bed. "I need to go home anyway, I've stayed here too long." He muttered as his body slouched over. "You can stay longer- heck – you can live with me." Rei threw up his hands as he stood near his short lover. "I would, and will- but I need clothes. So I'll just go home, get important stuff and run back here!" The blonde says, smiling at Rei. "Here's my number- message me that you're okay at home." The blue haired boy says as he typed in his number on Nagisa's Samsung. 

Getting the crutches, he helped Nagisa gather his uniform, his bag and shoes. "Thank you again, Rei chan." The blonde says cheekily, giving a small kiss to Rei's lips. Rei smiled into the child-like kiss, holding Nagisa's cheeks as he moved to pepper the blonde with kisses. Nagisa laughed, seemingly forgetting all of his problems, only he and Rei existed at that moment. 

After their short moment, Rei helped Nagisa stand at the front door, staring at the door as if he were to leave, he'll never come back. Taking in a deep breath, Nagisa gave a short nod, and Rei opened the door. The blonde man turned and saw his son. 

Nagisa knew he was faking, faking those emotions and tears, faking his love. "Oh god, I so worried!" The man says as he pulled Nagisa into a too-tight hug. "I'm fi-fine dad..." He stuttered, regretting his decision. "Thank you so much," the older blonde says as he wiped away his tears, walking Nagisa to his expensive looking car. The man put Nagisa's belongings into the backseat, picking up his son's glasses case that was laying on the yard. 

As they drove away from Rei's home, Naraku grabbed the back of Nagisa's neck, slamming him against the dashboard. Nagisa cried out in both shock and pain, starting to cry. His nose started to leak blood, the blood running and dripping from his chin. "You thought you could run from me?" His father hissed, releasing his hold on Nagisa's neck. "I love how you thought you can hide from me! It made my day!" He laughed, sighing with contentment. Nagisa kept quiet, trying to stop his crying. "I could've cared less about you, but your annoying sisters were worried about you." Naraku explained, his hands tightening around the drivers wheel. 

Arriving at the two story, hell house, Nagisa was pulled out from his side of the car. He fell with a groan, his ankle throbbing and shooting pain up his leg. Naraku dragged Nagisa by the collar of his shirt, sadistically enjoying the feeling of Nagisa writhing, enjoying hearing him gasp and cough for air. The man threw Nagisa on the cool wooden floor, hearing his head hit the floor with a thump. Naraka walked to the kitchen, grabbed the smallest frying pan and walked over to a writhing Nagisa. Glowering at his weeping son, disgusted that Nagisa existed.

He loomed over his son, holding the pan as if it was a baseball bat, letting the back of the pan hit his palm again, and again. The blonde male watched as his son rolled onto his hands and knees, trying to crawl away. Naraku stuck Nagisa's right leg, knocking him onto his side. Nagisa screamed, the blood drying on his face. Grabbing The boy's hair roughly, making Nagisa yell as his head was pulled back. "Your sisters can't save you now." He whispered to Nagisa, letting his head drop onto the wooden floor. Nagisa continued to writhe and sob, Naraku started to grow irritated by the pathetic sounds his son emitted. Naraku kicked his son's side, hearing Nagisa gag, he kicked again, kicking his lower abdomen. 

The blonde teen threw up what ever he had in his stomach, letting the tears drip down his face. "You're a mistake." Naraku states as he struck Nagisa with the pan, seeing him fall onto his back. Nagisa picked himself up again, trying to stand. "P-Plea-please stop... N-No more..." His son pleaded, Naraku kicked his face, watching his son's body fall back onto the floor. "You're nothing." He punched Nagisa's chest, hearing him yell and cough. Grabbing at Nagisa's shirt, he dragged him up the stairs, hearing Nagisa cry the whole way up. 

He kicked in Nagisa's bedroom door, learning him against the wall across his bed. Watching his son try to pick his pathetic head up, he grabbed his thin throat and started to tighten his grip. Nagisa's arms flailed and tried to loosen the grip around his throat. His magenta eyes wide, and his eyebrows furrowed. "You know that you were an accident right?" Naraku pressed on the boy's larynx, starting to repeatedly slam Nagisa against the concrete wall. He watched as his magenta eyes focus and unfocus. His blood stained lips part, trying to breathe. Naraku released his hold after Nagisa passed out. 

Growing even more angry, Naraku grabbed a bottle full of sand and small sea shells. Dumping out its contents, he smacked Nagisa with the glass bottle, watching him jolt awake and scream in pain. He wished the bottle had broke, he repeated the action, hearing shards of glass hitting the floor and Nagisa scream even louder in pain. The older blonde laughed at his son, looking pathetic and weak with some shards lodged in his left cheek. 

Naraku grew tired of son, he went downstairs, to the car and grabbed his belongings. Walking back to Nagisa's room, he tossed the metal crutches to the boy, hearing it hit him and causing Nagisa to groan loudly in pain. He dumped the rest of his things on his legs, Nagisa just coughed and moaned in pain. Naraku left with one punch to his face, watching his eye swell up. 

Naraku was satisfied with the beating Nagisa deserved for leaving. 

He pushed a shelf of books in front of his son's door, knowing Nagisa was too weak to push the shelf forward. 

Naraku changed out of his dirtied and messed suit into a new one, fixing his hair and wiping away the sweat that gathered on his forehead. Then he left the house, as if nothing ever happened 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm so sorry.


	6. Message

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rei finds out why Nagisa never texted.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> im still so sorry about the last chapter

Rei waited for Nagisa's text, checking his phone every hour. He called Makoto and Haruka, asking them to come over and try to keep him calm. Makoto said that he would see if Haruka's still sick, if he is, he'd still bring him to Rei's house. Rei shook his head at his friend, wondering why he said that in the first place. 

Waiting for his two friends to arrive, the blue haired teenager paced in his living room. He gnawed on his closed hand, fighting the urge just to go to Nagisa's place and take him. He couldn't think about anything else _but_ Nagisa. 'How is he? Is he okay? Does he need help?' He thought to himself as he continued to pace back and forth.

Sometime after 11 A.M. a knock stops his thoughts, he walked to the door and opened it to both Makoto and Haruka. Makoto was in a green sweater, saying some western word. He wore simple black jeans and converse shoes. Haruka's mouth and nose were hidden behind a plain face mask, obviously still under the weather. The raven haired boy wore a black, thick looking jumper, having blue jeans and black and white vans. "Rei, you look terrible." Haruka bluntly states to the teen at the door, Makoto starting to freak out due to his bluntness. 

After that, Rei just laughed and let them in. "I like your house, Rei." Haruka complimented the purpled eyed boy, who just mumbled a shy, "thank you." "Wait, where's Nagisa? He didn't go back home did he?" Makoto questioned, looking to Rei over his shoulder. "His dad came to our- my door and just, took him. Nagisa said that he'd get clothes and run back here. I don't know why I believed him– he can't even walk!" Rei almost yelled out as he began to pace again. 

"Rei, we can always just use my car to pick him up." The taller brunette says to a very worried Rei, almost laughing at how worried he was about Nagisa. "He hasn't messaged me, and I'm worried." Rei ran his hands through his blue hair, pacing in the hallway. "How long has it been since he left?" Makoto asked as he watched his friend pace in the hallway. "Been almost four hours, it shouldn't have taken four hours for him to get home- pack his things and try to come back here." Rei started to bite his nails, choosing to sit on the sofa. 

Haruka kept quiet, looking bored as he sat on the long sofa, resigning to laying down. "Oh, Rei, do you have medicine for Haru- just in case we have to stay long." Makoto asked as he went to the kitchen area. "Yeah, in the fridge; left side." He instructs, continuing to stare and bounce his leg. "Okay, thank you." Makoto sat where Haruka was, letting his boyfriend's legs rest on his lap. 

Haruka's eyes started to droop, trying to fight the need to sleep. Feeling Makoto take off his mask, the gentle brunette smiled and gave a kiss to his hand. Haruka knew why Makoto took off his mask, Makoto didn't want Haruka to breathe in his own sickness as he slept. 'Go ahead and sleep,' Makoto's gaze said, stuffing the mask into his sweater pocket. Haruka nodded, letting the arms of sleep wrap around him. 

Rei observed the two across him, watching their movements. He always wondered how they worked, they were a mysterious duo. He knew Makoto could read Haruka's mind, and vice versa. He assumed, and theorised that they spoke through touch and smiles.

He thought about how he and Nagisa would communicate, would it be quiet and wordless like Makoto's and Haruka's– or would it be loud and vocal. How would they act around each other alone? Would they enjoy each other's presence in a comfortable silence, or would they act like children– build pillow forts, have pillow fights maybe even have a Nerf gun fight. Rei kept thinking about all the possibilities he and Nagisa could have. 

_The teen dreamt of he and Nagisa, living in a house with two children running about the house. Nagisa chasing the little girl and boy, laughing about as he ran past Rei, who held a baby. Though, the children's and infant's faces were fogged out, he didn't mind. "Rei-chan, can you help me catch them?" Nagisa asked as he tried to catch his breath. Rei felt himself smile as he handed Nagisa the baby, rubbing his hands together and seeing the two children. He jogged to them, hearing their excited screams as they ran away from him. Eventually catching the two, he walked back to see Nagisa feeding the baby, making his arm 'fly' around, using a small colorful spoon to feed the baby. Rei felt himself become happy, watching his lover happy and smiling._

Hearing his name, slowly woke up from his dream, opening up his eyes. "Rei, can Haruka use your shower? He kind of... Threw up and didnt make it into the restroom..." Makoto explained as he turned red, due to embarrassment. "I cleaned up, all he needs is a shower and then we'll leave." He added looking to Rei, looking for any signs of disgust or anger. "Yeah, it's okay, does he need extra clothes- I have some extra-" Rei was about to offer, but Makoto refused and explained how he knew this might happen. "I brought him extra clothes, so it's okay, but thank you." Makoto smiled as he went to wash off his boyfriend. 

Rei got up and stretched, hearing his joints pop. Reading his wristwatch, it was past 3 P.M. He checked his phone, saddened by not hearing from Nagisa since 7 A.M. Deciding to call him, he was sent straight to voice message. "Sorry that I couldn't get to answer you!! Rei-chan!! Be in my audio thing for my phone!! Rei-cha—" and the voice message ended, Rei starting to worry. Walking in front of the bathroom door, he knocked and said, "Makoto, can you please drop me to Nagisa's house when you go to Haruka's house?" Rei practically pleaded, hearing Makoto's muffled approval. He went to the living room, pacing in the area. 

After around thirty minutes, both Makoto and a sickly looking Haruka emerged. Makoto was carrying his lover in a bridal style way, Haruka's head resting on his chest, near his heart. "I'll put in Haru, first, and we'll be ready then, yeah?" Makoto said, adjusting a droopy Haruka, making secure his hold was secure. They walked to Makoto's car, it was a black Mitsubishi lancer, possibly an older model. It has Iwatobi-chan on the top of the dashboard, sitting for all to see. 

Settling Haruka was an interesting sight to see. The raven haired teen didn't want to let go of his boyfriend, grumbling as Makoto tried to set him into the car seat. Eventually, Haruka gave up (mostly because he grew tired again) and let Makoto rest him on the seat. Inhaling deeply, Makoto let out a long exhale and flashed a gentle smile to Rei. Said teenager sat in the back seat, behind Makoto, not wanting to bother Haruka. 

The drive was quiet, but not an awkward one, but a gentle and comfortable silence. Haruka moved every so often, trying to find a comfortable position to sleep in. Rei just switches his attention to his phone, trying not to feel anxious about Nagisa. 

Arriving at the two story home, it was a beautiful looking house.  [It was an American styled home, the lights lit beautifully and it looked grand.](http://cdn30.us1.fansshare.com/image/losangeles/special-olympics-dream-house-front-california-design-houses-concrete-modern-house-design-in-two-storey-house-design-houses-1621194095.jpg) Rei practically jumped out of the car, knocking on the wooded door. Makoto tapped his shoulder and held up a key, smiling at the worried teenager. Opening the door, [they they were greeted by an elegant stair case, the kitchen off to the left.](https://s3.amazonaws.com/PhenomHome/Images/Foyer/Depositphotos_8682238_s.jpg) Makoto bid him a good night and handed off the key to Rei, closing the door after him. Rei wanted to question on how Makoto got the extra key, but shook his head. 

He walked, stepping in some sort of liquid, he realised it was bike and almost puked at the sight. "Nagisa! It's Rei, where are you?" Rei called out, ascending the stairs and looking down a long hallway. He started to walk down the hallway, "Nagisa?" He called a bit louder, hearing his voice bounce to the end of the hall. Hearing muffled noises, he followed the sound. "Nagisa? You here?" He stood in front of a tall bookshelf, a cough and a raspy, voice saying 'yes,' could be heard from behind it. Moving the bookshelf, Rei slid it away to find something he thought he'd never see.

Nagisa sagged against the wall, groaning at the light that filtered from the hallway. Nagisa's room was dark, his window covered with storm shutters. Rei rushed over, peeling Nagisa away from the wall slowly, letting him rest on his arms. "Oh my god..." He whispers to himself, Nagisa looked so bad. The blonde has dried blood that came from his nose. The blood seemed to have run down his chin and neck, the collar of his shirt absorbing the blood. There were shards lodged into his once flawless face, the blood leaked down his chin and neck, absorbed by the collar around his left side. His beautiful eyes were lidded, looking so unfocused and foggy. His right eye was sort of swollen, looking more closed than the other.

The teen looked over Nagisa's body, trying to spot out any more bruising or cuts in the dark room. Rei adjusted his arm, so Nagisa's head sagged forward, his small head resting on Rei's chest. The panicking teenager scooped the lower half of his lover's body, bringing him out to the hallway. He pulled out his cell phone with shaky hands, dialling 119. He almosted screamed at the responder due to his panicked state. "Please! Just- HURRY!! Please, please!!" Rei yelled, putting his phone down, and holding Nagisa close with both hands. 

"Hey, hey, baby? Can you here me?" Rei asked to Nagisa, seeing a small nod. "Rei... So tired..." Nagisa huffed out, his breathing starting to slow. "No, no, no, no– please don't go to sleep." Rei begged, rocking back and forth slowly, trying to keep Nagisa awake. Nagisa just grunted softly, trying to open his eyes some more. Rei didn't even realise he had been crying, crying since he saw his precious lover in such a manner. "Can you stay awake for me? Please?" Rei pleaded as he hiccuped in between, brushing away some hair out of Nagisa's eyes. Still rocking him

It was a blur when the ambulance and it's paramedics arrived. Rei was pulled away as two women transferred Nagisa to a board, being placed into a gurney. All Rei wanted was to be by Nagisa's side, begging, pleading and trying to push against the stronger paramedics. "Please, let me go with him! Please, I'm begging you!" Rei begged as he fell to his knees, "who are you to him?" A gentle voice asked him, a hand placed onto his shaking shoulder. "I'm his partner, please let me ride with him!" Rei looked at the lady, his eyes and throat burning. She helped him into the back of the vehicle, telling him to stay near the doors. 

Nagisa gave into sleep, the paramedics having the defibrillator within hands reach. They cut away at his clothes, revealing ugly bruises of all colours. One near his midriff was blue, red and purple. The one near his neck was a nasty bluish purple, seeing a some fingertips around his neck. Above his right knee, there was a blue and purple, some reddish dots blending within it. His eye was now barely swollen, his eye a nasty purple and red, some spots of blood beneath the skin. 

All Rei wanted to do, was hold Nagisa's soft hand, tell him it's going to be okay soon. Tell him that he'll be there from now on, guarding him from anymore harm. _Tell him that he's sorry for not protecting him._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Why do I do this to my babies


	7. Comatose

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rei meets someone he thought he wouldn't see.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yikes, my dudes

Arriving at the hospital, Rei was told to call anyone he wished to pick him up. "Sir, due to Nagisa's type of injuries, he will need surgery. There were obvious signs of broken bones, amongst other things." The doctor explained calmly, as if it were nothing to worry and fuss over. "We'll let you see him before surgery, he might be a little woozy due to the anaesthesia, okay? So don't worry if he slips in and out of consciousness." She smiled, giving his shoulder a reassuring squeeze. 

He followed her to a room beside the operating room. Seeing all these people touching Nagisa made him uncomfortable, making a slight face at the sight. When majority of the nurses left to prep the operating room, he almost cried at the state of Nagisa's body. His sunshine boy was pale, so pale. There were heavy bags under his eyes, one darker due to the black eye. Nagisa's cheek looked clean, having butterfly bandages covering three of the gashes. The bruises around his neck still looked so bad, so did rest of the bruises. Going to his side, Rei held his hand. His fingers were so cold, they were always so warm. He kissed the top of Nagisa's head, inhaling the faint smell of cinnamon and strawberries. "Sir, it's time for him to go into the operating room. You can call someone to pick you up, if you wish." The doctor offered as she looked at him one last time, going into the OR as she did. Rei was left in the room, he pulled out a phone an dialled someone he hasn't seen in a while. 

"Hello?" A croaky, yet very grumpy voice said through the phone. "R-Rin, can you pick me up from the hospital?" Rei shyly asked, walking out to the nearest balcony. "Can you also buy a pack of cigarettes on your way down? I'll pay you back- for gas and the cigarettes." He added through an irritated voice. "Whoa- Rei, you smoke?" Rin asked, almost like he laughed at the fact Rei stress smoked. "Yes, now hurry the hell up." Rei hung up the phone and tapped his fingers along the cemented railing.

"What are you doing here?" A gruff voice asked, Rei turning to see it was Sousuke. The usually intimidating looking captain, looked worn down and exhausted. "Why do you need to know?" Rei asked in an angry tone, not wanting to see anyone else besides his ride, at this point. "Was the blonde one yours? The one that looked really bad?" Sousuke bluntly asked, recieving a face from an irritated Rei. "His name is Nagisa, and since you know why I'm here- what are you doing here?" Rei asked back, watching Sousuke's face kind of falter. "Aiichirou." 

Rei didn't realise what he meant, until Sousuke's tear filled eyes met his. "Wait- what happened?" Rei asked in a soft, gentler tone as he watched the taller swimmer make his way to the railings. "He... He–" Sousuke stuttered as he began to cry. "There was so much blood there. I-I couldn't— why did he try?" he hiccuped as he cried into his hands, dragging it down his face. Rei had a feeling as to what he meant, he felt sorry for the black haired boy. "I wish I could've signs, you know?" Sousuke croaked out, trying to calm himself down by rubbing his face. "Yeah, I know what you mean..." Rei replied, remembering when he saw Nagisa's thighs. 

"Mister Yamazaki?" A voice called, Sousuke seeing it was a nurse. "Aiichirou finally woke up." The nurse added with a smile, watching as Sousuke's face light up. He looked to Rei, feeling bad that he has to leave him, "go ahead, go see him." Rei said with a small smile, watching Sousuke dash to the nurse. 

Waiting for another thirty minutes, Rei was lost in thought when a hand slapped his back. "Holy shit Matsuoka, don't do that." Rei jumped as he saw the red haired shark. "I didn't know which brand you wanted, since you didn't tell me-" Rin says to a startled Rei, tossing him a pack of cigarettes. "It was the cheapest." Rin added as he opened one for himself. Lighting the cigarette, he put the white coloured stick in between his lips. Rei did the same, feeling the smoke fill his lungs, relaxing him. 

"Did you know what Aiichirou was here?" Rei asked in attempt to kill the silence. "Yeah, the whole team knows, but only Sousuke, the coach and I know why." Rin added as he blew out smoke, the wind taking it and making it fade. "Sousuke took it hard, as he was the one who found him." Rin explained, inhaling the cigarette deeply. Staring down at the cars below.

"When we came to the hospital, his forearm was almost covered with blood, almost making Seijuuro almost throw up. I had to help Sousuke wash it off, because he was just... In a daze, of sorts." Rin huffed out the smoke, watching the far away waves. "Sousuke said that he was in a coma. It's been almost a month since," he added, Rei looking to him. "Aiichirou is awake, a nurse told Sousuke when he was out here with me." Rei saw Rin turn to him. "Really? You're not messing around?" He question in both excitement and disbelief. Rei nodded, watching the red haired boy dash to the hospital doors. Finishing his cigarette, he snuffed it out and threw it into the trash. 

Walking back inside, he found a chair near the wall, finding a comfortable position. He might as well break the news to the doting team mom, also known as Makoto Tachibana. "Hey, Rei!" Makoto chirped through the phone, Rei can practically hear his smile. "Can you come to the hospital? It's hard to explain over the phone, you can bring Haru, though, Rin and Sousuke are here." Rei advised, hearing Makoto sigh. "Haru doesn't need to dive in the recreational pool- so I'll just tell him and I'll be down there in five." Makoto says as Rei said an 'okay, bye,' and hung up. Texting him which floor he was on, he changed his position. 

Rei should get some sleep, taking it whenever he can, right? 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> You'll get a fluffy ending.


	8. Miyagi

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Makoto and Haruka try to keep Rei distracted and worry free.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I don't know what I'm doing anymore. This entire fucking chapter doesn't make sense #way too tired when I write.

Feeling a soft tap on his shoulder, Rei peeled open his eyes to see Makoto's face next to his. "I got here ten minutes ago, and I didn't want to bother you." Makoto explained, smiling at an awaking Rei. "You didn't have to, you know? Also what time is it?" Rei says, voice croaky and dry. He stands and stretches out his arms and back, feeling his back pop and fingers too. "It's almost one in the morning. Also, I want to take you to home so you can change out of those clothes, on the way- you can explain to me everything. Then tomorrow, we can go to Miyagi. And, as captain, you shall not stay in the hospital any longer." Makoto stated as he gave a gentle push for Rei to move.

"Can I just ask them to call me when they're done?" Rei asked, trying to turn and stay, not wanting to leave. "No- you're going and we're gonna go to Miyagi and visit a friend." Makoto explains to the fidgety teenager, still pushing him to the hospital's elevator. Watching Makoto push the L1 button, feeling the elevator kick into gear. "Miyagi? Why there?" Rei inquired, obviously surprised by Makoto's suggestion. "Well, Haruka likes the mackerel and meatbuns there, for some reason. Also, there's a friend who does volleyball and we've been meaning to see each other! It's been about two or three years since I last saw him." Makoto explained as they came to a stop, walking out of the elevator. 

"But, why tomorrow, why can't I just stay? You know, just in case Nagisa wakes up." Rei says as he follows Makoto to find his car, "wait, what?" The brunette asked, obviously stunned at the news. Rei just mumbled, "I'll explain in the car."

Finally finding his car, they pile in and drive out of there. "So, what's going on?" Makoto asked as he kept his eyes on the road, looking at Rei every so often. "Well, when you dropped me off, I went to look for him. I did find him, but... Th-the way I found him..." Rei trailed off, remembering how he found Nagisa mere hours earlier. Starting to breathe fast, he didn't want to remember anything from today. How could he not, it was still fresh in his mind. It replayed in his head again, going onto repeat. 

"Rei. Breathe." Makoto instructed, hearing his younger friend starting to hyperventilate. Seeing the blue haired boy nod in his peripheral, he instructs Rei to breathe slowly. "Rei, inhale once I hit three, and exhale when I reach six – okay?" Makoto asks, hearing Rei breathe out an 'okay.' "One, two, three." Makoto counted slowly and calmly, hearing Rei inhale deeply. "Four, five, six." Exhale. The two repeated the action until Rei was fully calm and able to explain how he and Nagisa were at the hospital. 

"Sorry about that..." Rei apologised, clearly embarrassed by what ever just occurred. "It's okay Rei," Makoto flashed him a quick thumbs up. "Back to what I was... Explaining. I was on the upper floor, and I just kept calling him. I suppose he heard me, so he made some sort of groaning noise. The thing is– I had to push a bookshelf away from his door. Someone blocked his door, I guess trying to hide him away." Rei paused as he tried to keep himself calm and collected. "His room was so dark. I almost _thought_ I saw Nagisa against the back wall. He looked so bad, Makoto. He had blood from his nose, and there were some glass shards lodged into his cheek. His crutches and bags were on his legs, looking as if it was just dumped on him. Makoto, he had bruises that were wrapped around his throat." Rei was starting to tear up again, remembering the bruises.

 "I don't know how long he was there, but once I held him– his breathing started to, uhm– slow? So I called the paramedics, and everything after that– until we got to the hospital– was a blur." The blue haired boy finished, not even realising that they were at his home. Makoto looked like he was going to cry, with his green eyes wide and shocked. 

Makoto sputtered, obviously not knowing what to say. "Makoto, let's go into the house–" Rei suggested as he opened is side door. Walking to the door, he realised that he never locked the top lock, opening the door easily. Once inside the home, he walked to the bedroom, almost stepping on Nagisa's uniform blazer. Picking it up, he placed it only Nagisa's side of the bed– which was the middle.

Hearing Makoto close the front door, he totally forgot he had Makoto here. "Makoto– you know you can go home right? It's really late and Haru probably is going to be really mad." Rei explained to Makoto, who looked alarmed. "Oh yeah! I forgot that I– kind of lied and said I was going to go to the store..." Makoto's face saddened, looking as if he just kicked a kitten. "Just say that you couldn't find the medicine– and had to come to my house." Rei walked over, pulling out the flue medicine and tossing it to Makoto. "Oh thank you, Rei!" Makoto chirped as he gave Rei a hug. 

Saying their goodbyes, Rei decided he might as well sleep. Changing out of the clothes he had on, he just put on his pyjama pants and climbed into the bed. He pulled the blazer next to him, holding it closely. 

Rei knew it was silly. He only slept with the bubbly blonde only three times— _but he was already addicted to Nagisa._ Rei was addicted to the boy's hugs and cuddles. Hearing his heartbeat as he slept– telling Rei that it wasn't a mere dream. Rei was addicted to his voice, his laugh and mostly– his smiles. God, he was like a drug addict, Nagisa was his form of heroin. _The blonde was better than any heroin that he tried._

Not even realising he fell asleep, Rei turned to squint at the alarm clock on his far right. 3:37 A.M. Rei groaned and managed only to sleep for almost two hours. He felt so groggy and his body felt like numb and airy. Choosing to sneak to the hospital, he hoped Makoto wouldn't get upset. As he was about to get up, his phone pinged, _'don't you dare go to the hospital - Mako.'_ Rei groaned and should've predicted that Makoto knew what he was going to do. 

It's not like Rei was (more like wanted) to disobey his friend's demand– but he didn't want Nagisa wake up to an empty hospital room. Some god out there only knows how badly Rei wanted to tell Makoto to, "shut up and imagine if it was Haruka, and not Nagisa." The blue headed boy shook away his thoughts and laid back down. Rei was thinking so much, he didn't realise he fell asleep. 

The next morning, he was awakened by Makoto calling, "we're going to be there in less than ten– so hurry up!" Rei rushed to get ready, showered with in a minute, got dressed in under fifty seconds and dampened his hair in under twenty. Hearing knocking, he tried to manage his crazy locks, noticing his black roots starting to show. 

"Good morning!" Makoto beamed, Haruka looking better than he did the yesterday. "Why so early?" Rei questioned as he started to lock up the door. "Miyagi is far, Rei– about a two hours drive." The brunette explained, the trio piling into his car. It was 8:34 A.M. 

The drive wasn't so bad, at least for Makoto and Haruka. Rei's worries grew each passing mile, his anxieties about what could happen multiplied. "Rei, he's going to be fine– I asked the hospital to ring us if there's any complications with Nagisa." Makoto said, watching Rei let out a breath. "Thank you so much." Rei say back and tried to enjoy the blurring sceneries. 

Arriving at Miyagi, they were greeted by a tall boy, with short brown hair and eyes that matched. He almost didn't notice the grey haired boy behind him, noticing how short he was compared to the boy in front. "Daichi!" Makoto chirped, hugging his friend. "Whose this?" The brunette asked, referring to the short grey haired boy. "This is Koushi," Daichi introduced, Koushi giving a small wave. "C'mon, I'll show you to my place, you can sleep in the extra rooms I have, yeah?" Daichi offered, both Koushi and him going into his car. Makoto nodded and did the same. 

Arriving at his Daichi's home, it was average looking, to say the least. White exterior with a blue painted roof. Inside was calming and peaceful, Rei almost wanted to fall asleep in the entry hallway. "Koushi, can you please help me start cooking?" Daichi asked, Koushi went to help the taller boy. 

"They're dating." Haruka spoke, looking up to Makoto. "Obviously," he retorted. Rei just sighed and went to their living room, sitting on the floor. "You can sit on the couch you know?" An orange haired boy said, scaring the living hell out of Rei. "Shouyou!" Daichi called, catching the attention of the orange haired boy. "Sorry about him, he's staying with us." Daichi explained, trying to shoo away Shouyou. Rei wanted to press and pry for the reason, but chose not to– it'd be rude and disrespectful. 

"No, Koushi! That's not nice!" Shouyou suddenly bursted, scaring everyone but Daichi aand Koushi. Rei turned to Koushi, catching how he used his hands to sign. Maybe Koushi was mute?

After lunch, the group headed out to town, Daichi, Shouyou and Koushi leading the Iwatobi trio. "Tsukishima!!" Shouyou called out, making a very angry looking blonde turn his way. "What do you want?" Tsukishima responded harshly, a small, freckled boy next to him waved at Shouyou. "You two out on a date, huh?" Shouyou asked sing-song voice. "Tsk, what is it to you?" Tsukishima asked, turning away. "Yamaguchi, let's go." And off the two went. 

They met many more of the team. Meeting another calm looking boy named Azumane Asahi, and his bouncy and overly hyper friend Yuu Nishinoya– Nishinoya was practically attached to the long haired boy. Another interesting duo, was Ryuunosuke Tanaka and Tobio Kageyama. Where would Rei even begin with those two? First, Tanaka tried to intimidate him, getting in his face and, in the end– stripping off his shirt. Tobio, just glared and scowled at the new trio. In the end, he wondered how Makoto met Daichi. 

As the day began to turn to night, they ate dinner at Daichi's home once again. The entire volleyball team there, as well. To sum it up: it was loud and three of them ended up drunk. 

Makoto, a very worn out Haruka and Rei said their farewells and left. 

In that time, he didn't feel any anxiety about leaving Nagisa at the hospital. Didn't even worry– well, he did, up until he drank some (three bottles) of Fireball and was drunk. 

Makoto and Haruka were glad they helped their friend not worry so, so much– well, tried to, anyway. 

(Haruka never got his meatbuns or mackerel.) 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Lmao would y'all like a story for the Haikyuu!! Gang or Sousuke and Aiichirou?


	9. Numb

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rei slowly returns to his past ways

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, but imagine ganster/biker Rei??

_"Everything hurts. Everything hurts. Everything hurts." Nagisa cried, bleeding from his wrists. "Rei-chan... How come you did this to me?" He breathed out. Rei looked at his hands, only realising that he had an Exacto knife in both palms. "Rei-chan. Do you hate me?" Nagisa kept up, the blood keep pooling out. Rei yelled and screamed that he didn't hurt him and that he didn't hate him. It felt like there was a wall that blocked out what was saying. "Rei-chan... Do you want me dead?" Nagisa vanished, leaving only his deflating clothes. Suddenly hearing an annoying beeping, it continued to gradually get louder and louder and louder._

Rei jolted up from his nightmare, shaking and sweating. It was his stupid alarm clock, signaling it was 5:34 A.M. He was breathing hard and unable to control it. "One, two, three," he inhaled deeply, exhaling once he mentally counted to six. Wiping away his sweat, he shakily stands up on his legs, accidentally knocking over a bottle of alcohol onto its side. "Son of a bitch..." He whispered to himself, bending to pick it up. Hearing his phone beginning to ring, he blue haired boy slugged to his phone, which was on his shelf in the living room. "Hello?" His voice was scratchy and dry.

"Are you coming to school?" Asked a worried Makoto. "Isn't it a fucking Sunday?" Rei hissed at his concerned friend. "No it's not, it's fucking Monday. Rei, I'm going over there after class, do you understand me? Your ass better there." Makoto's voice deepened, scaring Rei a small bit. He has never heard Makoto cuss, let alone that voice in that tone, stern and commanding. "Yes, Makoto. I'll be here, probably drinking." The blue haired boy warned, hearing Makoto grunt and say 'fine,' and ending the call.

It'd be about six or seven hours until Makoto goes to visit him. With that in mind, Rei dashed to the room. Throwing on some band tee, black jeans and his adidas. The purpled eyed boy tossed a thick, blue hoodie over his torso, relishing in the soft material.

Hopping on his motorcycle, he started it up. He put on his black helmet, pulling down the visor to hide his face. Smiling at the engine and how loud it got as he revved it. Rei kicked off, driving to the hospital. He felt so much adrenaline, adrenaline he hasn't felt in so long. Before moving to Iwatobi, he had a certain reputation in his home town. They called him all kinds of names and titles. Rei wasn't about to dive into that part of his life again. He twisted the handle, feeling the motorcycle go even faster.

Arriving at the hospital, he drifted into the sidewalk parking. Pulling off his helmet, his dyed hair was a mess, but he pushed down and combed through it. Once he felt it was tamed, he strolled into the hospital. He knew he caught the attention of most of the people in the main lobby. Though he paid no mind, his face told a different story. When he looked around, the few who made eye contact and visibly shuddered, turning away quickly. He stepped into the elevator, pressing the L4 button.

Once he arrived, Rei headed to the counter. "Excuse me," he says aloud, not meaning to sound gruff and mean. A female turned to him, a glint in her brown eyes. "Yes, may I help you with anything?" She asks, her tone obviously meaning something else. "What room is Nagisa's Hazuki in?" He question, giving her a face. "He's in room 419," she gave a pass. "Oh, by the way," he paused, watching her lean a little closer. "I'm gay." He walked away, leaving a very stunned and obviously pissed off nurse at her station.

Knocking on his door, he opened to see a sleeping Nagisa. Walking over, he placed a soft kiss to his forehead. Looking atall the machines he was attached to, he realized that one was a ventilator. The tube that was connected, was put into Nagisa's mouth, white strips was put across his cheeks. There were many other wires going into his love, almost crying at the sight of him. Nagisa's heartbeat was steady and strong. Rei pulled a seat next to the bed, putting his head near Nagisa's hand. He walked his fingers along his short fingers, shuddering at how cold they were. 

"Baby, I don't know if you can hear me or not, but I wanted to say– I'm sorry for not protecting you. I really am. Don't blame yourself, don't ever think it's your fault for whatever happened to you. I'm probably not making sense, again. Just know, that I love you so, so, so much." Rei whispered to him, still concentrating on his fingers. "Mister Ryuugazaki?" A gentle voice called, earning the attention of the teary eyed male. 

"I assume, you want to know what's going on, yeah?" He asked as he pulled out a file. A flimsy, ivory coloured folder with 'Hazuki, Nagisa,' written on the flap. The doctor had a middle age look to him, jet black hair with a few grey spots, heavy bags and signs of obvious tiredness. He stood around Haruka's height, maybe an inch taller. The man wore a plain blue button up, with black slacks and business shoes. "I'm Doctor Nasuke, sorry for the delay in introduction." The doctor introduced himself, Rei now knowing his name. 

"Well, during surgery, Doctor Hujisaka and I found lots of injuries. One, being a broken rib that pierced his lung, in which it collapsed. Broken ankle and a fractured knee. Mister Hazuki seemed a little too far on the slim slide, which contributed to his bones breaking easily." Nasuke explained to Rei, observing him as Rei began to tremble. "During surgery on his knee, Nagisa flatlined and we had to hook him up to the ventilators and stabilised him. He was breathing fine after we took him off the ventilators. Yesterday, around two a.m., he flatlined once again, making us repeat with the ventilators." Doctor Nasuke finished, turning his attention to the sleeping blonde. 

Rei's mouth was slightly ajar, trying to find the words. "Now, his brain activity seems to be fine, which means – probably – that he isn't ready or doesn't realise that he's in a coma." Nasuke explained to an already stunned Rei. "What do you mean?" Rei finally managed to piece words together, turning to the doctor. "Some coma patients, are mentally awake, but not physically. In their minds, they may or may not realise that in fact, they're still asleep." Nasuke further explained as he walked his way to Nagisa's left side. The doctor wrote some things down some things on his clipboard, and alongside Nagisa's file. 

Rei zones out, looking over to Nagisa's sleeping face. "I'll check on him within a couple hours, if there's any changes– signal the nurse." Doctor Nasuke with with a nod to Rei, closing the door behind him. Letting out a breath that he was holding, he places his his back onto the bed. The blue haired boy fell asleep listening to the beeping of the heart monitor.

Feeling his phone vibrate in his pocket, he answered with a tired and dry voice. "Yes, Makoto?" Rei questioned tiredly, looking out the window, seeing the sun has faded away. "I told you to stay your ass home didn't I?" Makoto hissed, still using having tone with him. "Yes, I just wanted and needed to visit Nagisa at the hospital." Rei sighed out, not wanting to speak to Makoto– or anyone else for that matter. "And, before you said anything– if I didn't come to the hospital– how would I have known that Nagisa flatlined during his surgery? That he's in a coma, and lastly– that he has to be put on life support?" Rei snapped at Makoto on the phone, whisper yelling at him. 

The line was quiet, except for a few shuffling sounds. "What? Got nothing to say, Makoto? Got nothing to add on?" The angry boy questioned, "no, I got nothing to add because they did call me when he flatlined, when he was put on life support. Once during surgery and the second after surgery." The brunette on the other line explained, obviously sounding remorseful and apologetic. "Great, just fucking great Makoto. Does Haruka know too?" Rei walked outside, dashing to the hospital's balconies. He recieved a small, "yes he does," and all hell was let loose. 

"Why do I, his boyfriend, have to know about his condition last, huh!? Why didn't you tell me in the first place– were you even planning on telling me?" Rei paced back and forth, yelling at his phone. "I was, but you were drunk and I didn't want you to try and visit him in that state." Makoto explained to him calmly, surprising Rei. Rei was trying to calm himself down, pulling out a pack of cigarettes and lighting one up. "I got to go, thanks, Makoto." Rei hung up his phone, sucking in the smoke from the cigarette. He blew it out, watching as the smoke dissipated into the wind. 

After snuffing out his cigarette, he flicked it into the rubbish bin on the way in. The stressed boy pulled out a pack of (strong) mint flavoured gum. He popped one into his mouth, in attempt to rid his mouth of the cigarette smell and taste. 

Rei went into Nagisa's room, sad to see him still asleep and not breathing on his own. He saw a small leather recliner, pulling close to Nagisa's bed, he turned it into a bed of sorts. He read his watched 9:30 P.M. He spent an hour or more talking to Makoto. 

"Goodnight, baby..." He said to Nagisa, in hopes of him hearing him. Rei reached for his hand, placing a soft kiss onto it.

_He fell into a dreamless slumber, tossing and turning on the stiff recliner. He prayed to every god out there for Nagisa to wake up, hoping he returns to the smiling, bubbly and hyperactive boy he fell in love with._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry for the following:  
> 1: THE ATTITUDE CHANGES IM SO SORRY IM SO SORRY  
> 2: THIS FUCKING TWIST I JUST. UGH IM SORRY.  
> 3: THE TWISTS AND TURNS


	10. Awakened

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's been a month since Nagisa was last awake.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> mm, fluff.

Everyday was a struggle to wake up, for Rei. He would wake up, look to an empty bed, Nagisa's vest resting on that side. He'd drag his feet to the bathroom, looking more and more terrible as each day passed. The blue-haired boy tried to keep up on his studies, only to get frustrated and drink a can of beer.  ~~~~Rei hated himself so much for returning to his old habits. Drinking, lighting a cigarette, eating and then throwing it back up. The cycle repeated three or four times each day, Rei becoming more aggressive and troublesome, almost getting into a straight up brawl with another student.

Rei was surprised that he managed to pass the semester with his usual grades, but suspended from doing any club activities due to attempted fighting. Rei shrug it off, staying home and staring at the wall. Ever since he was told Nagisa was in a coma, he steadily declined into depression and anger. Angry at himself for not doing anything, not protecting Nagisa. He heard the hospital door open, seeing Makoto and Haruka. After the yelling at Makoto, Rei called him back, apologising profusely until Makoto almost yelled at him, saying it was okay and not his fault. 

"It's been a month, Rei." Haruka states, again wearing the sweater he was last seen in. "Yeah, and I've been visiting each day– just in case he'll wake up." Rei explained to Haruka, looking at his sleeping boyfriend. His blonde hair has lost its softness and bright colour, changing into a dull blonde, his hair feeling dead. "What if... He–" Haruka as about to ask, but quickly shut up when Rei shot a look to him. "If he doesn't– then I'll just move back home." The purple eyes teen states, continuing to look at a sleeping Nagisa. 

After some small talk, the couple left, telling Nagisa that they pray he wakes up soon and come back to school. Rei was left in silence, except for the beeping of Nagisa's heart monitor and the exhaling of the ventilator. Doctor Nasuke came in, almost frowning at the sight of Nagisa and Rei. "I'm sorry to explain this..." The doctors started to explain, Rei's skin beginning to pale. "If there's no brain activity within the next week... We need to know if we can pull the plug. Since his parents– seemed rather busy to care about their son. You signed the medical documents, thus being his medical adviser." Nasuke finished, hearing Rei crying. "Please, no, no..." Was all Rei managed to say, his eyes beginning to turn red. After handing Rei the papers, he left, closing the door. 

Rei continued to cry, sobbing into the bed as he kneeled beside Nagisa. "Baby, please wake up..." He hoarsely whispered to Nagisa, reaching up and caressing the healed scars on his cheeks. "I-I need you, baby." Rei continued, tears still rolling down his cheeks. He tried to speak, only to sob. He continued to sob on his knees, crumbling to hold his head in his hands. 

It seemed like an eternity until Rei practically cried himself out. He stood up, slugging to the bathroom, taking off his glasses and almost laughing at how pathetic he looked. Puffy and red eyes, a red nose, his cheeks a light shade of pink. Turning on the tap, his hands gathered water, splashing it onto his face. The cool water against his heated face made him relax some, only for his sadness to return in a flash. The blue haired boy walked out, almost expecting Nagisa awake and okay. The boy stared at the sleeping body, watching his chest rise and fall as Rei made his way over to the recliner. 

Laying down his exhausted body, holding onto Nagisa's hand, still cold and pale. He fell asleep laying on the side, watching Nagisa's chest move as the ventilator helped him breathe. 

Waking up around 3:13 in the afternoon, he hoped to see Nagisa upright and looking to Rei with a smile. Not all hopes come true though, he awoke to Nagisa in the same place he has been for the last month. He yawned, getting up and walking out to get some coffee. Having known the path to the floor's only vending machine, he exited the room, walking to the waiting room. Spotting the blue vending machine, he almost ran to it, desperate for some caffeine. 

Standing in front of it, he pressed the number, watching as the machine got the small can of macadamia nut coffee. His face felt sticky and dry, eyes burning. Opening the can, he drank it as he made his way back to the room. 

"Rei-chan?" A very raspy voice asked, Rei almost having to do a double take to see it was Nagisa, who called for him. Nagisa was awake, trying to move and sit up right. The blonde haired boy groaned, almost yelling in pain. Rei ran to him, laying him back down. "Please, baby, just lay down, okay? I'll go get the doctor, yeah?" Rei frantically asked as he slowly backed away from a groggy Nagisa. 

Running up to the doctor, he tapped his shoulder, trying to keep himself calm. "He woke up. He woke up!" Rei says to him, almost crying because Nagisa woke up. Rei lead the doctor, more like left him as he dashed to the room. Entering the room, he saw Nagisa trying again to sit up right. The doctor soon followed, smiling at his awake patient.

Nasuke made his way to Nagisa, assisting him, holding his back and hand as Nagisa sat up. "Feeling any pain, Mister Hazuki?" He asked, Nagisa quickly nodding. "My back, as if I haven't moved in forever." Nagisa states too casually, making Rei stiffen a bit. "Because you were in a month long coma, Nagisa," Nasuke states to Nagisa, who stared at him dumbfounded. "A coma?" Nagisa was surprised, slowly turning his head to a teary eyed Rei, who confirmed it with a nod. "You flatlined twice– once during your surgery and once again after surgery." The doctor explained, letting Nagisa go once he was up straight. He took off the breathing tube, turning off the ventilator.

After all the normal questions, like, "what year is it? "Whas the last thing you remember?" "Do you remember who this man is?" Nagisa answered to all, having no amnesia. The doctor went further, telling both males that in a couple days, Nagisa may be able to start physical therapy. He left with a smile and a congratulations to Nagisa, shutting the door. 

Rei didn't wait anymore, he slid onto the hospital bed, starting to pepper kisses all over Nagisa's face and neck. "Rei-chan, stop! I probably smell bad!" Nagisa tried to push Rei off of him, the blue haired man letting him go. "Rei-chan, why are you crying?" The blonde asked as he wiped away tears from Rei's purple eyes. "It's been a month since I last saw you awake. A very long month, I must add," Rei chuckled as he hugged him softly, not wanting to give all his strength. "They asked me if I wanted to pull the plug on your life support, Nagisa." Rei pulled away, Nagisa pulling him back. "I'm glad you didn't Rei, I'd haunt you forever if you did." Nagisa laughed, combing his fingers through Rei's fading blue hair. 

"I must say, you look good with black hair." Nagisa compliments, feeling Rei's chest rumble as he laughed. "But you said you liked my hair, when it was still bright blue." Rei pulled away again, looking into Nagisa's magenta eyes. "I like your hair, I like your face, I like you– no, I love you." Nagisa simply says, as if it was the most obvious thing on earth. Rei couldn't help but smile, placing a kiss on his lips. "My lips are so dry, why'd you kiss me?" Nagisa let out a dramatic sigh, throwing his hands up. "Because, I love your lips, I love your hair, I love everything about you; even if your lips are chapped." Rei chuckled out, kissing his lips again. 

They stay like that, Rei and Nagisa smiling and laughing. Though, Rei got hit on the arm when he told Nagisa how he was holding up. How he argued with Makoto. How he drank almost everyday, barely ate and almost getting into a fight. Nagisa scolded him, shaking the taller make as he did so. Rei surprised by how much strength he had, but he couldn't complain– he was just beyond happy that his love woke up from his comatose state. 

Shutting him up with a kiss to his forehead. He kissed his chin, placing a kiss on hide small nose, kissing both cheeks, and ending it on his lips. "What was that?" Nagisa asked, blushing and surprised by that action. "It's what my mother and I used to do when I started preschool, she said that it means you love every part of them, each kiss representing a different part of your body." Rei explained, putting his forehead against Nagisa's own. "Your forehead represent your head, your nose is your chest, chin being your legs, both cheeks representing one arm, and your lips represent your heart and soul." Rei added, feeling Nagisa repeating the action. 

Nagisa said what each part represented as he placed a soft kiss on each part. "I love you so much," the blonde says to his blue haired love, "I love you more." Rei says, smirking as Nagisa pouted. "But I love you most," and he hugged Rei, feeling Rei's arms wrap around his chest slowly and carefully. "Rei-chan, I want to ask you something." The blonde suddenly asked, pulling away to see Rei's reaction. "Sure go for it." 

_"When can we get married?"_


End file.
